Marriage And Relationship

I try to be really careful when I am working with a couple, to allow both people’s story to come out. And for them both to get the chance to be heard. And more importantly for them to work on really hearing each other. The thing that makes it difficult sometimes is when one person has done something to hurt the other, but the first person continues to be (not just initially) defensive and more closed off to hearing about it. In my opinion part of the therapeutic work there is

I once thought it’d be great if people never fought or argued. I believed that until I realized that we need those conflicts, confrontations, squabbles etc. to bring us closer to each other. This is in pretty much any kind of relationship. Obviously, what the conflict looks like would be different depending on the type of relationship.  Having it out with someone, letting them know where you stand and them letting you know where they stand is important to the longer term cour

So you don’t want to do the daily check ins with each other. Or communication exercises. Ok. And how is your communication and overall...

There is all this forward motion and progressive movement in our culture towards letting people be who they are, feel their emotions etc....

The third super basic idea that can help save marriages is discussing division of labor between yourself and your spouse. Couples...

Getting on the same page with parenting is the second super basic idea. This is one of those simple but not easy things. We can get stuck...

“Our Problems Really Began After We Had Our First Kid”. This is a common thing that is said in both individual and couples therapy. Kids...

Sometimes couples get stuck in their sexuality for a number of reasons. One of these can be the reduction of non-sexual touch over time....

Couples often seek therapy to work on improving communication. Important issues often require an ongoing conversation. Sometimes we get...

When we use the word “intimacy” there can be an assumption of the closer the better. But there are limits, and having too much closeness...

They’re Boundaries, Not Weapons. “Fresh from my therapist’s office. Gave some tools, she did. Up against the wall pal! I got some...