Let me cry then.

There is all this forward motion and progressive movement in our culture towards letting people be who they are, feel their emotions etc. But in practice, how ok are we with allowing our significant other the space to cry? How uncomfortable are we actually? Does, it turn out that we do non-verbals (moan, a sigh, look away, try to fix) that might signal to our partner that its actually not ok to cry? And its not just crying. For some couples its anger. Some couples have a real struggle with going to a place of anger. Or acknowledging feelings of shame or guilt. Which then tends to set people up to have more difficulty owning their part in a situation.

So, all emotions have to be accepted (between each other and within ourselves) in order for the coupleship to function in a healthier way. And that can mean making it a practice to sit with the discomfort of someone else's emotion. And not try to fix it, not ignore it, whisk it away, explain it away etc. But to be there with them, with ourselves and our own feelings. Kind of subtle, kind of a feat in itself. And when we get more experienced with this, we become more intuitive and better at offering the support that our partner actually needs, and what makes sense in that moment. And, if I get decent at offering this to my partner, maybe I might try shedding a tear or two myself, and choose not to hide it.